The power of being negative all the time.

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The power to teleport, but in doing so you lose a limb.

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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De poverr too tipe relly shiiti annd stil bee undrstod bai rettadad peepols unly.

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The power to be blind when you sleep

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The power to play Call of Duty for free, if you've already bought the game not for free.

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The power to summon cops to arrest you

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The power to ejaculate

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you can shoot cars but the always hit you

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the power of mind controlling...yourself

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to be able to see through doors... only when there open

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The power to kill yourself if there is a bullet in your heart, brain, and liver all at the same time

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The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The power to think salmon.

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The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

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the power to create carbon dioxide (its the stuff you breathe out)

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The power to always lie even when you don't want to and then you have to truthfully say that you were lying otherwise the closest person kicks you in the groins.

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The power to live.

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

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The power to see you're self in a mirror

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The power to do something as powerful as thin air

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The power to have a power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!