The power to give yourself the most intense orgasm of all time at will, but it only lasts for a millisecond.

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The ability to screw up everything you say in the language that the country you are in speaks

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The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

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The power to not be Chuck Norris.

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THE POWER TO POTENTIALLY HAVE A USELESS POWER ONLY WHILE READING USELESS WEBSITES ON MONDAY WHILE IT IS RAINING ON FIRE

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The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

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The power to cure cancer, but only on corpses

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The power to shoot pieces of cheese from your eyes..

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The power to love Justin Bieber

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The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

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The power to make any woman fall in love with you (Single or not) But during sex you can't pull out and protection always fails.

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The power to, receive THE POWER! What is this power you may ask... it is the power of TRUE POWER!

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Eclairvoiance: The ability to forsee when you will eat your next cream-filled, chocolate coated pastry...

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The power to rain fireballs down upon those you love.

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The power to bleed anally at will

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The power to have incredible wet orgasms. if you are a man.

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the power to hurl apples at force but only when you have drunk 20 litres of water in one go

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The power to communicate with applesauce.

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The power to kill yourself

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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to be shitty

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Beeing 99% Bullet proof, with the 1% shifting places to whereever a bullet is about to hit you.

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The power to do reverse moonwalk

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The power to produce fingernails at will that people can eat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!