The power to lower the temperature in the room but only if you're cold

The power to fly, but only when you're on a plane

The power to easily persuade people to your opposing viewpoint

The power to teleport to the exact location there is a terrorist atack

the ability to smell sounds

The power to become white by going into midtown harlem at night and shouting: I HATE NEGROES!!! At the top of your lungs.

The power to have a shield stretch across your vagina, but is only activated when you see a very attractive man.

The power to be MAGNETO! And have the power to WELCOME TO DIE! You dare not WELCOME TO DIE? AHAHAH! X-CHICKEN!

the power to have the remote come to you.

The power to know the name of every show while the title card is in front of you but only if you are holding cheap mango chutney

The power to fart in technicolor.

The power of flight but only during thunderstorms

The power to telepathically fold paper.

Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

The power to resurrect as a corpse when you die.

Having the power to see in the dark if you are blind

The power to wake up every morning and have to pee

The power to fly, shapeshift, lift very heavy objects, teleport, and heal injuries every year only on the 31st of June

The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

The ability to make slightly off colored flags of any country that can not be used in combat.

The power to find gold in your nose but only when you pick it in front of others

The ability to swim in water.

The power to temporarily give yourself a random STD.

The power to transform any cutlery into a plastic spork, but only when you're in life threatening situations.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!