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Clarksonisms
Joe Blocked
Scumbag Steve
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The power to cry if you hear or see the word cry
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+91
The power to create powers
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+85
The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...
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+85
The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.
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+83
The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff
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+71
The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.
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+69
The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe
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+69
The power to change your eye color.
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+67
The power to not get crushed, only if you're in contact with something.
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+65
The power to see even though you can already see.
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+55
The power to fly during 0,2 seconds.
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+53
the super power to be annoying.Oh wait...*cough cough* deadpool *cough cough*
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+53
The power to wake up every morning and have to pee
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+53
God tier Waste of Space
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+51
The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female
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+47
The power to grow nipples all over your body at will
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+43
The power to get your blackberry to turn on slightly faster
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+27
The power to make cottage cheese...With you mind!!
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+27
the power to make the imaginary axix the best thinkers ever
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+19
The power to make food slightly smaller.
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+17
The power to be toilet paper and never run out of paper but still keep your sense of taste
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+17
The power to fly for as long the average human is in the air during a vertical jump.
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+5
The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?
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-1
the power to win any video game with your feet but only when intoxicated
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-5
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!