The power to be able to run at the speed of light only when you have no energy to stand up

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The power to sleep while you're awake.

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The power to read the terms of service.

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The power to shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane.

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Having a 5 second eidetic memory

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The ability to run super fast, but you don't have legs.

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The power to have a unique fart smell

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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The power to wake up to surprise sex in the morning... in prision.

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To be able to bend glass at will but if any of the glass breaks you break with it.?

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The power to have incredible strength, in the bathroom.

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to make asians smart

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The power to use you`re veins as a lasso.

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The power to get an erection watching gay porn

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

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The power to get your comment 1st

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The power to melt into a pile of sentient goo, but be unable to move or change back.

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The ability to spit in random obscure crayola colors.

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

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The power to stop time, but only when you are waiting for something.

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Being only half invisible.

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The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!