The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

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The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

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The power to talk without a tongue

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The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

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The power to avoid metal detectors, but only when you have nothing metal on you.

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the power to go back in time, but only back 1 second.

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The power to see the future, but have nobody believe you.

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The power to chew with your tongue

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The ability to part...hair.

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The power to become erect at the sight of a man's butthole, oh wait thats just liam flanagan

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the power to make pointless superpowers

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The power to make any woman sleep with you. but works only on dead ones.

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The power to eat a cheeseburger and still get fat from it

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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The power of micro penis.

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The power to summon a Genie lamp, that if rubbed allows you to wish for 3 pointless superpowers.

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Eat pizza but you have to be eating pizza

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to travel in time....2 minutes in the past exactly after..masturbation.... masturbation-time-loop...........

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

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The power to give anyone a Kim Jong-un haircut.

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The power to transform yourself into a perfect copy of your mother.

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The power to not be affected by bullets unless you are shot with one by a gun

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The power to turn into a lamp and stay that way till someone turns your light on.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!