To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

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The power to abstain from sex until you're married. At age 83.

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The power to f*ck yourself

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The power to melt into a pile of sentient goo, but be unable to move or change back.

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the power to see into the present.

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The power to throw crazed badgers 3% faster than the average human. However, you would have to find the badgers, and they would have to be angry. The power does not affect your aim, only your speed.

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The power to go suicide

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the power to copy super powers but no one has super powers

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to fly, have heat vision, lift heavy things with ease, and invulnerability.

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The power to turn into a toothpick. Once. And you can't go back.

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The power to be a Fox News anchor with something actually coherent to say.

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The ablility to think of the worst racial slurs, but only when a member of that race is nearby.

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the ability to grow your nails at will.

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solar powered night-vision

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The power to grow one wing

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The power to laugh uncontrollably in funerals

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The power to shoot spaghetti out of your finger tips.

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The power to glow while under the sun

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The Power To Have Only (This) One Power.

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The power to wet yourself at will.

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The power to Master Bait, endlessly without getting satisfaction. Moral: A little less conversation, a little more action please...

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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The ability to make up a new part of Pokemon, every time you sneeze.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!