The power to find a paper clip when you need one.

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The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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The power to make poorly drawn art in less time than it takes to blink.

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the power to read this pointleessuperpower

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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to make asians smart

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the power to read whenever somebody is about to make a pun but only if youve already heard that pun

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Meatvision.

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To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

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The power to melt into a pile of sentient goo, but be unable to move or change back.

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The power to f*ck yourself

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The power to throw crazed badgers 3% faster than the average human. However, you would have to find the badgers, and they would have to be angry. The power does not affect your aim, only your speed.

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The power to go suicide

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to fly, have heat vision, lift heavy things with ease, and invulnerability.

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The power to turn into a toothpick. Once. And you can't go back.

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The power to be a Fox News anchor with something actually coherent to say.

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solar powered night-vision

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the ability to grow your nails at will.

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The power to grow one wing

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The power to laugh uncontrollably in funerals

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The power to glow while under the sun

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The Power To Have Only (This) One Power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!