The power to write a country song

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The ability to sh*t actual bricks.

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The power to speak Italian fluently while dining in a Chinese restaurant.

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The ability to smell colors

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The superpower of surviving a gunshot, if properly attended in a hospital afterwards.

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the power to tolerate all the crap superpowers

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The power to defrost windows with the turn of a knob.

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The ability to get out of bed in a Monday morning even though you don't want to

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The power to find a paper clip when you need one.

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the power to itch your teeth

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The ability to scream and whisper at the same time.

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The power to heal someone's injuries by killing them.

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The power to have an ejaculate in your pants by looking a girl in the eyes.

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The power to turn your navel upside down

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the power of the succulent game

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The power to create shit

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The power to kill someone as long as they've already been killed.

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The power to breathe fire but onle when under water

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The power to think salmon.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The power to know the end of every movie ever.

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The ability to control water but only when it is raining

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The power to hear other people's thoughts when they aren't thinking.

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The power to incriminate yourself in a crime you didnt commit

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!