The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

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The ability to predict the future .000001 seconds in advance.

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The power to summon tastebuds in your asshole, but cannot be undone within 24 hours.

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The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

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The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

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the ability to type slower.

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The power to shoot a any amount of milk out of your belly button every July 4th at 2 o'clock

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The power to make you`re penis really long! Like 500 meters long, and not being able to make it short(er) again.

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The power to be frozen during each heart beat.

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the power to walk through any wall BUT the walls of the room you're in.

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the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

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The power to turn into birdseed

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the power to live a happy and fullfilling life...

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The power to ejaculate lazer beams...

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The power to waste time talking about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive

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The power to look at Chuck Norris. I dare you to try.

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Being able to not go to the bathroom...when you have to!

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to grow hair on your eyeballs

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the power to smell shit from miles away

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The power to not move but your always happy.

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Power to develop diseases.

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The power to find a paper clip when you need one.

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The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!