The power to bleed anally at will

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The power to have your right hand permanently glued to your face.

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The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

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The power to be mario for 10 seconds then you vomit shit for 17 hours. this happens every week.

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the power to fart your way to the moon

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The ability to be Edward Cullen

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The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

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The power to walk on frozen water.

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The power to do nothing with your life.

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the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

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The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

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The power to do reverse moonwalk

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The power to turn yourslef into a suicide bomber just as he blows himself up

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The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

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The power that will grant you no power.

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The power to never be tired, but only when rowing a boat.

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The power to eat a cheeseburger and still get fat from it

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The power to fly simular to a paper air plane. OH SHIT BIRD SHIT COMING IN.

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The power to attract cats but be allergic to them

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the ability to self resurrect only if you are not dead

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The power to control Rollie pollies

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the power to never be able to draw a straight line with a ruler

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!