- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The ability to listen to music anywhere at anytime, but only if it's from the Jonas Brothers.

the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

The power to change the color of your arm hair.

the power to make a super smelly fart every time you eat 40 cotton balls

Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

The power to think of pointless powers.

the power to make thin air that is harmless

The power to bleed anally at will

The power to have your right hand permanently glued to your face.

he power to make mistakes

The power to watch a movie without falling asleep through most of it

the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

The power to be mario for 10 seconds then you vomit shit for 17 hours. this happens every week.

the power to fart your way to the moon

The ability to be Edward Cullen

The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

The power to do nothing with your life.

the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

The power to do reverse moonwalk

Pointless Super Powers