- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to set money on fire

The power to hold your breath forever, but only in a hot-tub.

Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

the power to be powerless

The power to communicate with your own toenail clippings.

The power to die spontaneously, and have no one notice

Nipple Radar.

The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

The ability to listen to music anywhere at anytime, but only if it's from the Jonas Brothers.

the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

The power to change the color of your arm hair.

the power to make a super smelly fart every time you eat 40 cotton balls

Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

the power to teleport to the center of the earth

the power to make thin air that is harmless

The power to watch a movie without falling asleep through most of it

he power to make mistakes

The power to think of pointless powers.

The power to have your right hand permanently glued to your face.

the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

Pointless Super Powers