The power to control sloths

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The power to shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane.

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Hnavig the alibtiy to raed tihs.

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Tits for a guy.

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the power to get drunk you are needed

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The ability to make cringe worthy YouTube videos

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the power to crap out bite-sized super heroes.

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The power to start time only when it's on.

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The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

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The ability to breath in a complete vacuum but nowhere else

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The power to see the future, but have nobody believe you.

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Meatvision.

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You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

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The power to finish work instantly but only after the deadline

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The power to peel a banana with your foreskin

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The power to slap your buttcheeks together, then transform into a head of cabbage.

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The power to transform your foreskin to rusty iron.

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the power to distinguish gays from not gays..

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Taekwondo

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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The power to become invisible to anyone not looking at you or at your general direction.

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The ability to eat whole chickens at will, but only when yr not hungry.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!