Ability to shit nuclear waste

thumb_up thumb_down +131

the power to freeze time by 10 seconds but in the process freeze yourself too - mleo1

thumb_up thumb_down +125

The power of shrinking your own anus to subatomic size.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The ability to fly, but only when sleeping...

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to smell poop

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to attract bullets.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to read your own mind!

thumb_up thumb_down +103

the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to ejaculate lazer beams...

thumb_up thumb_down +79

The power to demand people to thumb you down! (That would make this pointless power even more pointless, which deserves a thumbs up... but...) Moral: THUMB ME DOWN! NAO!

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to make a pint a gallon

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

power to fly, but only if your inside an airplane

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power of bullet atraction

thumb_up thumb_down +63

To get to know everything Jack Nicholson has said yet you blurb out his comments and random and by the time you face this YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: You think this entry was boring? It is great actually, what? You say it sucks? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

thumb_up thumb_down +59

that each time your nearest friend gets hurt you get hurt with it more with 10 times

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

to make asians smart

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to teleport yourself naked in front of your mom each time she is naked. (it cant be shut of)

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The ability to hear fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to do anything as if you were god but only after you slay a mythical dragon and eat an Unicorn's poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The power to become a destructive green beast that demolishes cities, which you have absolutely no control over whenever you get angry or scared.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!