The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to teleport but only on the surface of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to fart upon command.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to shit whole balogna sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Immunity to medication

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Wait this isn't pornhub!?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The ability to run super fast, but you don't have legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The power to make other people hold their breath.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The power to make people work and read ????

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

the power to say funny joke, but only deaf people can hear it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power to pull your heart out from your chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The power to be powerless in situations u need them the most.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Giving a shit about someone's bull shit

thumb_up thumb_down -5

the power to stop writing pointless super powers

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The power to walk thru mud and not leave a footprint

thumb_up thumb_down -15

the power to glow in the dark during the day.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The power to look at yourself in third person

thumb_up thumb_down +174

the power to fly but only during a thunder storm

thumb_up thumb_down +144

The power to stop time, but only when you are waiting for something.

thumb_up thumb_down +134

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!