the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

The power to fly but fall when floating above the ground.

The power to look really cool when sitting in a chair when nobody's looking at you

The power to bring life to nobody, except Winston Chrurchil.

The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

The power to switch genders but you can't switch back.

the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

the power to sneeze cum

The ability to push doors marked "pull"

the power to be extremely guilty in the bum.

The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

The power to see in only one random color everyday.

The power to see everything BUT u have to be blind Or the powaaaaaa.... srry anyway the power to hear every damn thing but u have to def Congrats : u lost one of your senses for nothing at all have fun but I'm not talking to the blind 1 cause u know he can't see Wat I posted@_@

The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

The ability to read Captch codes perfectly but not being able to type them correctly

The power to not move but your always happy.

The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne.

The power to make cheeseburgers only when your tummy is full.

The power to give yourself Kidney stones.

The power to shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane.

The power to eat junk food at light speed

The power to fly only 5mm above the ground.

The ability to levitate birds

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!