The power to consume extrement and expire. Nero: This is simply my seal of quality.

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The power to not exist.

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The power to not be able to touch any living thing.

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The power to walk on very very shallow water (

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The power to talk to animals and have them partially understand you.

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The power to do EVERYTHING backwards

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The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

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the power to dislike this power

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The power to catch em all

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The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

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The ability to obtain a date with any girl you want, but only if you are gay.

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The power to be Chuck Norris. Oh wait..

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The power to fly but only when you are in a winged aircraft.

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The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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the ability to lick your own anus

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The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

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The power to not have powers that arent pointless but then you realize your a normal human bein then you just think hey mabey I can be like Batman but then also you were like hey why am I not a multi-billionaire . After this all you find out you have the power to wake up at 12 pm only while using a alarm clock set for 7 am

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the ability to write using your 'inside' voice but only once your vocal cords are compromised

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The power to post hundreds of pointless superpowers in minutes. Moral: It is always fun to see another person`s comment between mine with zero thumbs, while mine always keep the excellent two thumb quality! Lesser man would say thank you... I say you are welcome everybody ;) (A moral man original, because someone needs the balls of steel required to see things how they really are)

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The ability to be a 100% accurate shooter in basketball, however u get blocked every time you shoot

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The superpower to read minds only if they think about nothing

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The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

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The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

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The power to suck your own dick

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!