[insert pointless super powers here]

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the power to be in AA.

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The power to laugh while laughing.

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The power to only drink liquids

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The power to turn into a parking lot.

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the power to fly but your an Altophobic

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The power to make yourself numb and fall to the ground

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The power to sweat acid.

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The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

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The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

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The power to recite 1,000 digits of pie, but only when you need to say the Fibonacci sequence

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the power to fart mace

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You have the power to stop bullets from hitting you for a minute but after the minute is up the bullet will still hit you

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The power to make dad jokes.

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The power to write any thing on your chest with clear paint

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the power to make your best friend's crush fall in love with you, but not your own crush.

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the power to do blink every 20 years

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The power to survive a car crash only if it's between 9 and 9.30 am.

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The power to melt ice into hot ice

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The power to still have 0.01 percent of germs on your hands.

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The power to know the ending of every movie after you watch the first 10 minutes and compulsively shouting it out as loud as you can.

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The power to be invulnerable as long as you are dead.

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The power to have any computer in the world but it has to be before the 1990.

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Power to vomit violently during royal weddings.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!