The power to order stuff online with your dad's credit card

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The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

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The power to excrete food colouring from your sweat glands.

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The power to fly only when in a car.

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The ability to read a book by its cover

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the power to shrink down to the size of a quark but then you turn into a black hole and destroys the universe.

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The power to lose all your limbs

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The power to go through open windows

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the ability to cure anyone but only if you apply their injury to yourself

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The power to slow the rate grass grows for 10 seconds every 13 years.

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The ability to talk like Robert DeNiro on helium

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The power to hear train whistles from 50 miles away.

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To see what you are currently doing from the same perspective of your regular vision, with the ability to understand that you're doing it. But not have the ability to stop yourself from doing what you were going to do as if you didn't have the power.

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The power to go super saiyan for 0.01 seconds

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The power to transform into a 37 year old World of Warcraft playing virgin

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Teh pewer too dissablee speeltjeck Mortal: KOMBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!

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The ability to create a chicken egg, once and then never again.

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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the power to summon a bus, but it will only come at the same time as another bus

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The power to make any single girl instantly reach for her Mace.

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The power to tell a joke with no moral. Moral: There is no moral.

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the power to sugar a limpet

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The power to perpetually yawn.

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The Power to have all the super powers ever, fly great distance. Strength unparrelled. Sight bbeetter than any human on the planet. But your Spanish as well

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!