Ingesting caffeine gives you the power to be a normal, competent human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The power to shit a blue agressive monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

the power to go thru anything but get stuck in it

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to see in to the future of one second

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The power to possess every pointless superpower and be tasked with saving the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

The power to have to enter a survey for every internet download you use

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The ability to breathe automatically

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The ability to teleport less than 1 inch once a day

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The power to enjoy eating potatoes slightly more

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The power to forget why you got hurt when you get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How 'bout the power to move you? - Wonderboy

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The power to piss your pants each time you feel threatened.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The power to move objects by touching them.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The power to be the most attractive person ever but only in complete darkness.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The power of trolling your self

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Radiation resistance inversely proportional to the amount of radiation around you.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The power to give epilepsy to hamsters.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The power to enlarge your penis but only when you use a penis pump.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

The power to download anything you want to 99 percent complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

The power to think you have powers.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

thumb_up thumb_down -86

The power to make your hair look curly or straight once a year

thumb_up thumb_down -88

the ability to see perfectly through murky water, but only in complete darkness. you do not possess the ability to see in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +141

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!