The power to kill someone instantly; but you can only kill one person: yourself.

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The power to have sex and sleep at the same time

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The power to stop reading this. Or the power to live forever but only if you never ate BACON !

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The ability to turn your semen into spiders.

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the power to know what time is not

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The ability to be jokingly racist and not get sued by an hypocritically racist black man and end up having to carry out a minor jail sentence or pay a fine.

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The power of creating poop.

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having the ability to not piss yourself when your on the toilet.

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The super power to control paper.

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The power to read a dictionary in under 48 hours

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The power to turn cancer into aids.

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The power to see through water

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Having the power of a normal human

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the power to randomly sprout a paper clip once a month

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The power to heal people. But only sometimes and after you got a medical education.

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The power to shit rainbows but have incredible pain while shitting them.

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The power to see to the side of you without turning your head

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The power to WATCH ME WHIP AND WATCH ME NAE NAE

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The power to zoom in with your eyes, but only when looking to the sun.

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the ability to solve paradoxes

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the power to talk to fish but not people

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The ability to see through clear, colorless glass.

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Pain Absorber. Where u rid others of their pain but suffer yourself !!

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!