the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

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The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

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The Power of being Friendzoned

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North Korea's Nuclear missile program.

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The power to harvest the cheese off your wiener.

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The power to transform into an ant, but only on busy pavements in the after work rush.

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the power to reseal bottle caps

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The power to get the most rated pointless superpowers post

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The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

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The power to cry acid tears

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The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

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The power to make the tip of your penis invisible at will.

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The power to speak in cursive

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The power of believing you have a real power when you don't (which doesn't make you have a power at all, and consequently, turns into a paradox). Self-paradox man!

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The power to change the color of your piss

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The power to have super-sonic hearing, but only in the presence of the mute.

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The power to fly for as long as the average human is in the air during a vertical jump.

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The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

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The power to taste the 2% that's real juice

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The power of destroying anything that's inert with one punch, but dying afterwards.

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The ability to change your eye colour at will. basically, you do this with a torch. Everyone can do this.

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The power to shoot 4-7 flower petals out? of your wrist every ten days.

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Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

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The power to breathe under water, but only when you're asleep.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!