The power to have consensual sex with any dog of your choice.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

The power to shoot rainbows out of your elbows but consequently having your skin fall off

thumb_up thumb_down +48

The ability to cause cancer, but only at your own joyful events, like on your birthdays, wedding day, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

The power to see the present.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The power to predict yesterday's weather

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The power to have super human strength but only when sleep walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

the power to make toast into bread

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

the power to talk to your elbow

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The power to hurt the people you love

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

The uncontrollable power to teleport to the places you don't want to be and every time this happens... a random fat guy barfs on you

thumb_up thumb_down -54

The power to fart on a zebra when you are next to a zebra and have to fart.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

The power to be away from the Internet without getting bored.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

The power to envision 1 possible death scenario for any person you look at.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to wait 8 to 10 business days.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The power to focus with extreme power, only on your own focus though... Moral: Inception.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power to lose body parts spontaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Being a Spice Girl

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The ability to run... AT THE SPEED OF MAN

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The power to sing at an uncontrollably high level, but not have the ability to dodge a water bottle

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Power to always have exact change.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The power to speak brail.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!