The power to fart 5 times bigger

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THE POWER TO TYPE EVERYTHING IN CAPS-LOCK

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the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

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The power to have any stupid thing you do and experience being automatically uploaded on youtube.

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I am derpin the erp to derp the derp the erp o o o o yeah derp frika frika frika derp derp derp

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The power to do a hand stand with your feet

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The power to endure uncontrollable & highly noticeable erections at funerals

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The power to walk on your eyeballs, but only on sharp objects.

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the ability to see into the past

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The power to see through clothes of women 70+.

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The power to switch your left pinky toe with your right big toe and vice versa.

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The power to die

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The power to turn all of the air into a solid.

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*The power to fall, but only when you trip.

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The power to have sex with anyone, but only if they are older than 65

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The power to be happy whenever you want, but only at funerals

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The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

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Black power

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The power to always smell like cheep wine.

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To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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The power to go forward through time to a second from now. I wonder if I still be in this world then when I use that power though.

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the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

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The ability of telepathy but only when your targets are toast pieces, not whole toast mind you, toast pieces. This includes crumbs

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The power to help bitches stay alive! Bitches love staying alive!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!