Ladder hands.

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The ability to reverse your digestive system.

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The power to activate all musical instruments at full volume just by going to sleep.

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to steal other people's pointless superpowers.

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the power to think 0.0000000000000001 microseconds faster than usual

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the power to phaze through everything against your will

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The power to control hummingbirds.

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The power to move 1 vein slightly to the left, but only if you moved to an apartment on the 29th of February (in any leap year).

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The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

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The ability to feel pain 1,000 times more acutely than an average human.

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The ability to breath fire through your mouth but only when your mouth is closed.

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the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

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the power for men to squirt milk from their nipples

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power to breathe

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The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

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The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

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The ability to rape the willing.

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The ability to catch any ilness you want.

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The power to see through clothes, but only dungarees.

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The power to walk on water, but only if it contains exactly 0.25 ppm of Aluminum.

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Reverse Pooping

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The power to pee ants.

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The power to think of a witty comeback 3 days too late.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!