The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny

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The power to used any power i want when you're asleep

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the power to hear and understand all living things within 100 meters but they cant understand you and you can never turn it off.

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The power to grant underwater breathing to Mosquitos.

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the power to die at will

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The ability to read a doctor's handwriting

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The power to have bad luck!

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The ability to get a headache when you do or say something stupid.

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the ability to levitate your keft side of your body

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the power to read the thoughts of inanimate objects.

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The ability to yell through your nose

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The power to think of a funny power

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The power to look at huge breasts and avoid thinking about it.

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The power to not hear thunder.

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TyPiNg In LoWeR aNd CaPs To AnNoY oThErS

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The power to eat carrot cake, then die 12 seconds

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to give super powers to others, but only to people you don't like.

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The power of making your tits smaller

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The power to turn anything you touch into old.

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The ability to hand in assignments 1 day late

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The power to destroy the whole universe by any sudden movement. (Our existence rests on you`re shoulders man, don't even breathe nor blink)

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The power to make meringues levitate

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The ability to read anything, and never understand it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!