The power to jizz in your pants when you eat a grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to turn all of the air into a solid.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Ingesting caffeine gives you the power to be a normal, competent human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to pee out your butt and poop out of your weenie

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to obtain money, by going to work

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

thumb_up thumb_down +51

To be able to kill a Yak from 47 yards. No more, No less.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to turn your self into a rock that is being thrown into a volcano.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The ability to feel all pain 30 seconds after it happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

the ability to have every superpower that is pointless

thumb_up thumb_down +35

the power of fart helium

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The ability to inaccurately predict the future.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to use your legs in such a way that you can effectively walk,run or stay still whenever you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to never finish your sentences because

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The power to see through transparent objects.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

the power to find children extremely attractive

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The power to liquify yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The ability to day nearly motionless while binge watching internet videos

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The power to teleport to the place of where you are

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power of licking your own elbow and nose

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!