The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

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The power to be socially impenetrive.

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the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The Power to look mildly far away but only with something on your face to help you see

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The power to get all the superpowers but only in your sleep/dreams.

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The power to create little lightning bolts, but only by peeing on a electrical device, you can create little tiny lightning bolts.

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the power to spontaneously shoot glitter out of your ass

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The power to make the dead that where once deaf see again.

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The power to eat carrot cake, then die 12 seconds

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Any telePATHETIC power you may get.

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Q. How many police officers does it take to arrest a mexican [DARREN ROWLAND]? A. 4- 1 too arrest him & the 3 other to hold his oranges!

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the power to be able to shoot death lazers but only at people you want alive

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The power to know when someone around you is about to sneeze but not the specific person

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MARIAN PRICE ISN'T DEAD BUT SOME SAY SHE'S DEAD INSIDE

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The ability to never have to take a shit again

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The power to turn into a parking lot.

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North Korea's Nuclear missile program.

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The ability to blow air out but only after inhaling air The ability to rapidly grow body hair whenever you sneeze The ability to post pointless super powers onto a website The ability to teleport to a dimension where you are about to be eaten during a zombie apocalypse and not be able to come back. The ability to go to prison and not be able to get out.

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Gay mens power to making straight women like them...

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high.& the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking.

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The power to add a minus to your bank account balance.

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The power to make an awesome school lunch for the kids!

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The power to change skin color after being under the sun for too long.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!