the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

The power to breath underwater, but only after someone has recently peed in it

the power to poop out cactuses when no toilets are in a hour drive length away

The power to be invisible to the motion sensor cameras above automatic doors

The ability to go poop and pee.

The ability to create very weak wifi with a 1000000 character password.

The power to fly, but only downwards

The power to see through walls when standing near a person whose first name is flopalopgas.

The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

The power to taste anything you look at, except for food. Nothing edible counts...

The power of getting aroused when someone rubs your kneecaps.

The power to bleed when your grandmother kisses you.

The power to get hungry when looking at exotic animals.

Retractable Teeth

The ability to pause time. However, this pauses everything. Even you. You are screwed.

The power to have every type of phobia in existence.

The power to not get caught typing this in lesson.

The power to die using your willpower.

The ability to know if a movie's crappy just by looking at its cover !

the power to get every girl, that you're not into.

The power to time travel only a Planck second into the future.

the power to pee on command

To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

The power to predict the past.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!