the ability to see as well as stevie wonder

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to resurrect dead insects

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The superpower to realize that if you guys thumb my former comment up, then it is no longer a useless "superpower" and would by itself contradict uh... itself.. by being useful... Moral: Hey, turning into Beiber at will is useful for banging silly young chicks at will is it not? And I will rather bang brainless women (beliebers yes I mean you, because everyone deserves some love) Disclaimer: Sexual age of consent is 16 over here, and good luck calling a whole nation for pedophiles, nope girls simply mature faster here... Fact: Above.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to kill anyone just by threatening them with slavery and death and leaving foot and fingerprints all around their place. Moral: THREATEN MY PEOPLE WITH SLAVERY AND DEATH! THIS IS SPARTA!

thumb_up thumb_down +51

the ability to tell time without a watch

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to die on the spot and not revive

thumb_up thumb_down +51

the power to sit

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The power to shrink your dick smaller but an inability to make it larger (even back to the original size).

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The power to create skype chats with 50 people and subsequently annoy all of them with 200+ messages per second. unfortunately neither you nor anybody can block, silence or leave the chat

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The power to jump face first

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The immeasurable power to thumb this up all the way to the top... or even at all... I mean thumbing it down makes a lot more sense... then again this is pointless as hell ;D Richter : Hydro Storm! Rain: KSSSSHHH!!!! Dracula: Ugh agh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh... Ahh!! Iiiiyoouu!! Play time's over, grant me powweeeeeeerrrrrraaaaaaahhh!!! Richter: Hydro Storm! Rain: KSSSSSSSSHHHH!!!!! Fire burning Dracula: Chug chug chug chug chug! Dracula: No, this cannot be!!! AAAAAAHHHH!!! Fire burning the picture: Tugshung, gshung, gshung!gh... Moral: Now I am just screwing around, I recently played an dusty old game Called Castlevania: Symphony of the night... best game ever...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

The power to ejaculate needles.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The ability to look at the sun and not go blind. Because your already blind in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to never come into existence

thumb_up thumb_down +33

the power to make hate films against Islam... theres no space for bigots and jerks on this Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

power to breath fire but only through your nose

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The Power to rot you favorite food by looking at it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The power to identify a senior citizen by looking at their naked butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +172

The power to summon a rainstorm. Just a rainstorm, nothing else.

thumb_up thumb_down +152

the power to see 3 seconds into the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +152

The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

thumb_up thumb_down +148

The power to inhale coins without dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +144

The power to turn 12% invisible.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!