the ability to see one-half of a second into the future, but only activates while sneezing.

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The power to smell whore

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The power to teleport to Mars, but only when your not wearing a helmet and you must stay there for a maximum of one hour.

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Moral: THUMBS UPS SOLDIER!

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The power to control unsalted butter very slightly with huge amounts Of effort

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Ability to be Austin Calhoun when hes sick

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The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

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The power to use a ridiculous signature that kills any chance of receving green thumbs. Moral: What you talking bout foo?

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The power to have your entire body totally frictionless. Except for your nipples. They have a drag coefficient of around 5 parachutes.

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The power to make money disappear.

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The power to find this website and submit a pointless superpower.

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The power to masturbate only when someone is watching.

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the power to get married

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The power to digest corn.

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The power to be invincible......... only when you are not in danger or harm.

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power to turn into a shark in zoo cages

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The power for electronics to slowly deteriorate and completely break in just 6 months

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The power to knock yourself unconscious

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The power to glow in the dark, but only during the day..

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The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

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The power to break bones at will.

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The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

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The power to survive underwater, while holding your breath.

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The power to know when to hold them, but not know when to fold them.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!