- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

The Power to touch MC Hammer

The power to teleport......one nanometer every million years

The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

the power to stare at pit bulls in the eyes and imitate them

To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

The power to give yourself a migraine at will.

The power to think of a good super power right now.

The power to make grass grow 1cm longer than usual.

the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

The power to keep up with the kardashians

The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

the power to time travel to the present

The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

the ability to take an apple core out of the bin at will

the power to create a meme

The power to have perfect vision, but only in pitch black darkness

The power to see through walls, but only when you're in a glass room.

The power to eat anything, but always vomit 15 minutes later.

the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

the power of mind controlling...yourself

The power to turn invisible except for your fingers and toes.

Pointless Super Powers