The power to suck your own dick, by growing and shrinking your p3nis.

The power to Grow a baby in a woman.... for 9 months.

The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

the power to get wider by eating junk food

The power to sweat profusely on cold days.

The power to murder rocks.

The power to smell WiFi Signals

The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

The ability to speak to deaf caterpillers

the ability to blow yourself

the most bunka busting mega ultra super duper large biggest most powerfull cool best ever strongest mightiest power in whe whole universe but dont knowing what it is.

The power to Silence everyone when they're saying anything

the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

the power to fart at the worst moments

the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

the power to get married

The power to wake up every morning and have to pee

The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

The power to play FPS games in real life (respawning included) but lag a lot

the power to hold your breath 0.01 seconds longer than the average human

The power to permanently shorten your own penis

The power to think of epic jokes but only at funerals

power to turn into a shark in zoo cages

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!