The power to balance the light switch in the middle but only on the 4th try.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter off the ground and be hungry and if you don't get food within a nano second you'll die of exposure to any form of matter

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The ability to push doors marked "pull"

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The power to reed a platypus mind.

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Where to start? Ah yes...THE POWER TO NOT FREAKING DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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the power to morph into yourself

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the power to be able to light yourself on fire yet not be immune to it

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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The power to change traffic signals to anything that is not beneficial to you.

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The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

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The power to fart rainbows

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The power to smell any point in time

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The ability to think why does it say write your own when you type it.

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The power to read the terms of service.

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The power of love

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The power to break a Nokia

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the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

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The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

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the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

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The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

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Smell chick peas from over two miles away

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!