The power to die and not come back to life.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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the power to fail at life

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the power to the power to sit on your computer all day and read all of these pointless super powers while eating or drinking soda

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TREE POWERS ACTIVATE

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Brazilian waxing via telepathy.

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the power to disinfect wigs.

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on it .....

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to poop a penny every year

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to run as fast as a snail.

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The power to shit for 5 days

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The power to see in only one random color everyday.

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The ability to have A's in all your classes, but only if you already have A's in all your classes.

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The power to fart on a plane.

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The power to be the best driver in the world, when not moving.

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The ability to use the "wait" function from skyrim/fallout in real life.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter off the ground and be hungry and if you don't get food within a nano second you'll die of exposure to any form of matter

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The power to misspell when tyring to spell qukcily

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The power to shrink without the power to return to normal size

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The power to eat 100kgs of ice cream and only get type 2 diabetes

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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the power of the succulent game

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The power to have two eyes that can't see very far or through anything.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!