- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to piss at will but only when your bladder is full

The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

The power to transform any food into shit simply by eating it.

The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

The power to type random pointless powers on a website for pointless powers.

The power of 50% levitation your legs would drag along the ground

The power to cash cheques that are only ever made out to someone else.

Have all the superpowers there is in one milisecond every 100 years (If your still alive)

The ability to evolve into magickarp

The ability to tell what a tire tastes like from 6 inches away.

The epic power of laser pointer vision.

The power to get hurt without a break.

The power to destroy any electronic device seconds after touching itoesajfaokpnhgåpesajfjåaeafjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

The power to have amazing sexual prowess for 24 straight hours, but only on days that you have to work overtime. This is actually true.

The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

The power to whenever your punched you cry a lot of asid that burns your flesh

The power to turn a boomerang into a doggy toy

the power to get a random fruit every 10 days...

the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

The power to jizz mango chutney

to be able to fly but only 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000001 millimetres of the ground and not even feel or look like your floating

The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

The power to read this.

Pointless Super Powers