The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to turn shades of brown or red, but only when exposed to the sun for an extended amount of time.

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The power to see through solid objects, but only when said solid object is transparent.

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the power to do sit on your couch all day

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The power to fly 3 inches.

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The power to time-travel to the moment you die.

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The power of being pointless

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The power to uncontrollably laugh and point at every black guy you see

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The power to melt butter with your mind when its hot outside

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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The power to turn into random objects

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The ability to have any destructive power... As long as you use it on babies or old people.

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The power to do a back flip by drinking water during a front flip

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The power to take any object you are holding and swap it with anything within thirty feet

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The ability to have udders for nipples.

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The power to shoot off your clothes at any moment while using your hands and feet

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the power to go slower than a snail :l

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power to blow up your own head only once,

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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To be ALMOST able to run faster than a speeding bullet

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the power to tell Austin Zachrich to go pee

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The ability to teleport to the Taj Mahal whenever you want ONLY the Taj Mahal

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!