the power to make your nipples taste like shit and your shit taste like nipples

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The power to control Rollie pollies

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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The power to be hating when you see me rollin. Moral: ;D

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The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.

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the ability bend your legs in a perfect circle

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The power to scare female plants.

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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Power that makes you perfect in being useless

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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Will i tell you the joke about the butter? Aww no you'll only spread it!

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

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The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

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the power to eat an apple in an instant but you dont like apples

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The power to eat food, unless you're touching food.

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the power to not have super powers...

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The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

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the power to be able to run long distances without getting tired

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The power of women's rights.

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the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire

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The power to shit bricks, uncontrollably.

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The ability to instantly friendzone yourself.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!