The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

The power to to excrete fluids from your body after digesting food or obtaining liquids

The power of immortality, but only when you try to commit suicide.

Ability to eat a burger without going to the mall first and talking to your grandma there for 45 minutes about how it hasn't rained for a quite awhile and we could sure use some!!!

The power to give yourself a staticshock, every time you touch yourself.

the power to talk backwards

The power to turn shades of brown or red, but only when exposed to the sun for an extended amount of time.

The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

The power to become erect at the sight of a man's butthole, oh wait thats just liam flanagan

The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

The power to become perfect. Perfect: There can be only one moral man.

The power to eat your poop

the power to finish your plate of veggies when ever you like.

The power to control Rollie pollies

The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

The abiltity to grow an additional 4 fingered hand from your inner thigh

The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

The power to remove all flavour from food.

the power to freeze people only when it's cold

The power to think of powers someone else has already come up with

The power to create a clean and temporary bathroom only you can use when you don't have to use one

The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!