The power to text while driving and dies of cancer.

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The power to control any type of urine or feces

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The power to throw a Boomerang and it always hit your head.

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the ability to an app cost 1 cent less (no free apps don't count

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the power to teleport anywhere and see anything but every time to teleport there's 75% chance you'll die

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Being able to not go to the bathroom...when you have to!

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The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

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The ability to be Edward Cullen

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The power to know all the answers to life after you are fatally wounded.

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Basic telekinesis, limited to moving your body parts with your mind.

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

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hello

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Beeing 99% Bullet proof, with the 1% shifting places to whereever a bullet is about to hit you.

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The power to own Greek, Italian and Irish stocks.

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The power of making your tits smaller

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The power to walk on frozen water.

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The power to skip the Kripp.

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The power to peel a banana with your foreskin

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The power to RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE, only for becoming a homoerotic bodybuilder addicted to steroids made from white bull testicles, and eating so many that you eventually become a golden werewolf, a blue hedgehog or something like that...

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the power to accurately find out the temperature of a room by holding out your index finger pointing towards the sealing , but that only in rooms that have dissabled children who have lost there hands in tragic accidents.

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The power to exhale clouds.

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They power to be able to make meth.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!