the ability to change the color of one eye if dehydrated nearly to the point of death

the power to walk up the stairs without losing your breath...

The power to fall up.

The power to have night vision during the day.

the power to fly for 2-6 seconds only when every apple product in arizona is at 100% battery level

to talk in a mexican accent whenever you want to say "Whats up Essay"

The ability to teleport to any place in the universe, but only if it is currently occupied by something else

the power to speak only in binary

The ability to find a squirrels nuts

the power to be extremely guilty in the bum.

The power to smell thoughts.

The power to hover 1 foot off of the ground.

The power to plank

The power to have no powers

The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

Power to develop diseases.

The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

The power to avoid metal detectors, but only when you have nothing metal on you.

The ability to levitate birds

the power to immediately become gay after beginning to feel attracted to a member of the opposite sex & then once you are attracted to a member of the same sex you become straight.

The power to look ugly when people look at you but look hot when no one looking at you

The power to resurrect as a corpse when you die.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!