The power to write a moral under each comment. ( Just a thought: when did most of these become superpowers? I mean is women`s period become superpower? And becoming Justin Beiber? A superpower? I need to change my definition...)

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The power to become extremely good at licking pussy... cats.

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the power to teleport yourself to a volcano core

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The power to make poorly drawn art in less time than it takes to blink.

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The power to erase stupid blogs or comments

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The power to see into the present

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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the power to be the best at a game but nobody knows you

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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The power to see very far with the eyes closed.

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The power to be yourself.

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the power to become retarded

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The power to speak any language, provided that no one around you can understand it.

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The power to easily dodge any bullets from any weapons ever... as long as the bullets are made of cheese.

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The power to pee out of your nose and drink out of your ears

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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the power to be the best looking person but only to rapists.

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The ability to fly 6 inches off the ground

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The power to f*ck yourself

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the power to see into the present.

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To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

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The ability to fly while on a plane. You can only do this at the same altitude and speed of the plane.

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The power to pick something up and stay the same.

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Everything Hawkeye does

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!