The power to repel women.

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the power to fart every time you blink

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The power to turn gold into lead.

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the superpower to be able to fuck extremely good with or without genitals

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the power to breath through your skin.

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The power to kill someone by looking at them but you must be blind

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The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

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The power to climb ladders faster.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

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The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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The power to grow hair on your eyeballs

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The power to see into the future of the past

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The power to erase stupid blogs or comments

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the power to move something right next to you

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The power to get a boner when you're horny.

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The power to see into the present

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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the power to seduce hats

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The power to be yourself.

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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The power to create shit

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the power to go on the internet, but only when there is no wi-fi

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!