The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to only be drunk while driving.

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The power to read the minds of rocks

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The power to turn invisible but only when no ones around

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The ability to make Mondays come after Sundays.

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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The power that whatever song is playing is your favorite song

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The power to create shit

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penis

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The ability to become the most attractive person in the world, but only when you're all alone. Also, it doesn't show up on film.

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The Ability to remove your penis and grow a new one. the old penis will grow roots and become a penis tree. A lovely addition to any home.

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The power to make yourself numb and fall to the ground

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The power to speak brail.

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the power to cure someones cold by giving them AIDs

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The power to get your comment 1st

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The power to die at will

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The power to watch Kristin Stewart "act" in any movie.

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The power of reading your own mind.

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The power to see through air.

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The power to have approximate knowledge of everything.

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The power to change your eyebrows daily

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The power to use the internet whenever you want, but only on dialup

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the power to f**k your family all at once

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The power to be pointless!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!