The Power to Die instantly.

The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

Q: What is 1+1? A: An equation.... Duh...

The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

The ability to transform escalators into stairs.

The power to have every single power you can imagine but not able to use any of them

The power that whatever song is playing is your favorite song

The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

The power to fly but only if you standing on the ground

mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

The power to look through really thin glas without any view obstruction.

The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

The ability to sense any and all ham in a five mile radius.

THE POWER TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS

The power to be doing something else then typing a pointless power

The power to throw crazed badgers 3% faster than the average human. However, you would have to find the badgers, and they would have to be angry. The power does not affect your aim, only your speed.

The power to divide by zero, but not remember how when someone asks you.

The power to just eat one lays potato chip

The power to become an extremely attractive straight man in only the presence of 83 year old homosexual men

The ability to enter a coma but not be able to control for how long

The power to read minds. ...of those who went through brain death.

The power to stop making up pointless super powers and submiting them on a website called pointless superpowers

the power to read and agree with the terms of service

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!