The ability to not come back to life when you die.

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Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Waiter: I'm terribly sorry sir, please let us replace your soup with a more satisfactory one which is hygienic, and does not contain a dead organism. Customer: Thanks.

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To connect to the Playstation network with your mind! Who would want to?

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The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

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The power to slam revolving doors.

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The power of intermittent hand seizures, at the most unfortunate of times.

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The ability to understand women!!

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The ability to watch an episode of 60 minutes in 59 minutes

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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the power to youtube poop

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Truth is in the eye of the beholder, I AM THE ONE AND ONLY BEHOLDER!

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the power to lift anything under the weight of 2 lbs

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the power to fly that only activates when you REALLY want to kill yourself by leaping.

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

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the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

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The power to turn apples into pears

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Power to find things in the last place you look.

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The power to make dogs quit sniffing you.

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The power to fly into the sun.

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the power to see through cereal box to see if there is a prize inside it.

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The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

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The power to let anything you eat taste like sh*t

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!