The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

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The ability to fly but only when you touch the ground.

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the ability to taste the difference of 3 types of cheeses

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The power to see red in a slightly lighter shade

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The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

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The power to suck deez nuts

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The ability to fly only as fast as you can walk.

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The power to cough, but only at funerals, and speeches

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the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

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The power to sing that lame "Tomorrow" song from Annie uncontrollaby on Dec. 21, 2012.

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The power to take huge shits at will.

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The power to forget why you got hurt when you get hurt.

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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having superpowers during the inquisition

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The Power Above This Power During Night time. The Power Below This Power During the day. Invulnerable for one second during dawn and dusk.

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the power to find children extremely attractive

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The power to repeat everything you say twice. The power to repeat everything you say twice.

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The power to write about power.

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The power to be a bird that can't fly

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The power of love

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The power of always having small, thin clothes in the winter.

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The power to jump, but only on the ground.

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The power to never be hungry for five minutes after you eat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!