The power to block bullets with only your pinky toe on your left foot.

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The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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To Shoot Piss Out Of Your Mouth Only If You Are Taking A Dump

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The power to light things on fire with a match

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My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

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Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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DE POWER TO SPELL WRIGHT LOL LAOM FOTOSINSISES

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The power to breathe underwater, only when your not underwater.

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The ability to make your handwriting invisible when nobody is reading it

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The power to be able to make yourself catch on fire, but not be fire proof...

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The power to move infinitely fast up spiral staircases, but the inability to go down them.

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The power to think that mayonnaise is an instrument.

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The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

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The power of having useless wings grow on your testicles

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the power to troll people that are dead

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The power to turn your tv on, but only if your in a different country to the to.

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the power to be a master carpenter, make anything, except love.

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The power to increase the loudness of a crying baby.

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The power to burp whenever you want to, but only after you've drunk 15 Dr. Peppers

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The power to be quite good at checkers.

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The power to change the colour of your internal organs.

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The power to hear yourself on recording and not think you sound weird

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The power to shrink, but only for roller coaster rides

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The power to forget what you were going to say

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!