the power to think 0.0000000000000001 microseconds faster than usual

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The power to accidentally make pop-up adds appear on the device you are using if you click the X on a website or add!

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the power to allow diet coke to make you fat

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The power to feed cat toes to your boss but only during a job interview

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The ability to breath fire through your mouth but only when your mouth is closed.

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To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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To be able to cut grass to the femtometer of any desired length, but only whilst standing in the eye of a hurricane.

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The power to detach you`re penis and use it as a throwing weapon... to late you discover its not possible to attach it back :(

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The ability to wink with both eyes, at the same time

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the power to talk to fish but not people

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beard snap. ...snap your fingers and beards for all !!!

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the ability to fly- but only indoors

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The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

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The ability to have every pointless superpower then, now, and in the future.

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The power to fly but only in closed spaces

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The power to bleed

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The Power to defeat anyone only when they are already defeated

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The power to talk to dust

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The power to teleport to the center of the Earth.

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The power to have bad breath after you brushed your teeth.

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The power to think about useless power

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the power to reach a top speed of 200 miles an our, but only in built-up areas

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The power to run at the speed of a human

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The power to sh!t using your mind.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!